Obama's pledge to cure cancer

President Obama has pledged to find a cure for cancer. Just reading these words made my eyes well up with tears. God bless you, Mr. President. And I hope we do find a cure. Soon.

Oooh, Mufasa!

Today at lunch me and my friend Robin spotted this little doggie outside Freebirds. I kept thinking he looked familiar...then it came to me! He looked just like one of the laughing hyenas on the Lion King! Can't you just see him going, "Mufasa! Ooooh...do it again! Do it again! Mufasa, Mufasa, Mufasa!" :)

Baby Jackson & the March of Dimes

Jackson was born on January 13, 2009, three months early. He has already overcome so many obstacles in his short life. He has had a hole in his heart, swelling in his brain, bleeding in his brain, and trouble breathing on his own. Each day is a blessing for Jackson. My brother′s girlfriend, Carla, is like an aunt to Jackson – she is best friends with his mom. Both Jackson and his mom are fighters from what I hear, so please help us raise money for the March of Dimes. To help me raise money for this cause, please see http://www.marchforbabies.org/jennherber.

my last piece of gum

Last night as we were finishing dinner, my brother's girlfriend got out a pack of gum with one last piece in it. Without even exchanging words, she split it in half and handed a piece to my brother, then chewed her piece. I couldn't help but smile because I realized that's what I'm looking for -- someone to share my last piece of gum with.

My day with mom

My mom has always had beautiful, thick hair, the bluest blue eyes and great legs. I've always been jealous of those attributes. But I realized today that there are so many more things about my mom that I admire. Like the fact that she has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I've ever met. She was adopted and is still discovering things about her birth parents, but jumped at the chance to start her own family, which probably took some courage. She's also very brave.

Last Friday, we got good news from the oncologist -- he told us that the cancer is only in the breast and has not spread anywhere else. After some tears of joy, she immediately asked when we could start chemo. Imagine, she was excited to start chemo! Her chemo starts this Friday and even though I know she's scared, she's facing this journey with amazing courage that frankly I didn't know she had. I'm so impressed.

Today we visited the American Cancer Society & picked out two wigs. Mom didn't want to wait until her hair starts to fall out. I steeled myself for the moment she started crying, but it never happened. Mom and I actually had a good time trying on wigs and head covers. We laughed a lot and we found two really beautiful wigs that looked amazing on her. We have a long journey ahead, but she seemed so relieved to have that taken care of. I feel honored and blessed to have shared that experience with my mom.

Reunion After 40 Years

Just wanted to share this great story:

Creepy Weird Long Nails Broken

Ok, I would feel sorry for this lady, but I'm completely creeped out...and cannot stop wondering how she does things like put clothes on, brush her hair, etc. Eeeeeeeeuuuuuwwwwwwwwww.

Oscar #3453

It must have been so frightening for him, all alone, without his other shiny, gold, bald buddies! Apparently Oscar #3453 missed his flight to to Hollywood for the big show. He found himself flying alone to Hollywood, poor little guy. Read the story here.

I'm dying to know the rest of the story! Someone better write about where Oscar #3453 ends up!

Dexter!

I promise to write about more than our family pets soon, but I'm excited because starting on Sunday, I get to babysit my brother's little doggie, Dexter, for a few days! We'll see how many accidental pee pees before I am not as excited about dog sitting. But ain't he darn cute?

Our little Hero

My mom's dog Hero won the "Best of the Rest" of the breeds in the Statesman's online dog show contest! I had forgotten I even entered him! (see slide 13) Of course we already know how special this doggie is...it's because of him that my mom discovered the lump in her breast. So he really is our Hero.We love you, dude.

overwhelmed

I realized today that I am overwhelmed with information about my mom’s cancer – and maybe it still hasn’t sunk in. I’m going through the motions, but I’m already in a fog. That familiar fog that I went into when my dad got sick. It took me a long time to climb out of that fog…and here I go again. I don’t want to be in a fog. I don’t want this fight with cancer to go the same way. It won’t. It can’t. But what if it does? Holy shit. I’m scared out of my mind. My sister had a panic attack when we were at the oncologist’s office Friday. I’m surprised I didn’t have one too. When do I get to have mine?

Things we know: stage three. That’s bad – it only goes to four. Shit. Spindle cell malignancy. Sarcomatoid carcinoma or sarcomatoid breast cancer. We don’t know yet. No clue what the difference is. The tumor is 7.5 x 6 centimeters big. That’s like a tennis ball. Chemo for sure, surgery for sure. Mastectomy. Major surgery, more time to heal, more chances of something going wrong. No visibly swollen lymph nodes, but it’s very likely that there are tumors in the lymph nodes. Shit, shit, shit. Doctor says without chemo, there’s a 40% cure rate for this cancer. It improves dramatically with chemo treatments. What?!?!?!? That sucks! That’s not good enough for me. I want 100% cure rate.

Next steps: blood work, PET scans and CT scans to be sure it’s limited to her breast. Please, God. Chemo will start in the next few weeks and will happen about every two weeks. I don’t like this…I don’t like any of this. Can my mom tell how freaked out I am? I hope not.

Shut your chip hole!

The other night at dinner my 14-year-old nephew asked us, "Why do they say shut your pie hole? Why isn't it shut your chip hole or anything else you eat hole?" So naturally, we all laughed out loud and now can't stop saying, "Shut your chip hole!" :)

stone in love with neal schon

Woman With a Plan

Oh yeah, I’m sure this lady has all sorts of problems finding men…I really should feel more compassion for her since she is so hideous...shame on me.
Photo credit: Statesman.com

It's about forgiveness

I've always loved that Don Henley song "Heart of the Matter." Today someone told me about a study that found that the only thing all cancer patients have in common is that they all had someone they didn’t forgive for something. I’m not sure how much truth there is to that, but it sure makes you think, doesn’t it? We’re supposed to forgive people; you always hear it’s not healthy to hold on to anger. Maybe there really is some truth to that.

worm tumor

OH MY GOD. As if I needed something new to worry about! Wash your hands, people! Cook - and cook again - your meat! Yuck, yuck, yuck.

Natural High

So I've never been a big fan of country music, but the oldies but goodies always get me. I just heard "Natural High" by Merle Haggard. I'm now obsessed with this song. Simple, but beautiful...says what it needs to say. Love me some Merle Haggard.

Natural High (1985)

You stayed with me through thick and thin,
Watched me lose, you watched me win.
You picked me up off of the ground.
You never one time let me down.
And you put me on a natural high,
And I can fly, I can fly.
I was drowning in a sea of make-believe,
As helpless as a falling leaf.
You gave your hand to me that day,
And you did it, 'cos you're made that way.
And you put me on a natural high,
And I can fly, I can fly.

Instrumental break.

You always seem to let your feelings show,
You love me and you let me know.
Darling just remember these three words:
I love you, I love you.
And you put me on a natural high,
And I can fly, I can fly.

And you put me on a natural high,
And I can fly, I can fly.

50 more years

The worry is creeping in. The guilt is definitely creeping in. I fear that we’ll get even worse news from the surgeon tomorrow about my mom’s breast cancer. I’m trying so hard to stay positive and I know that we are all ready to kick cancer’s butt. I keep saying to myself, “I can’t do this again.” I keep replaying times when I’ve been less than kind to my mom, remembering all those years when our relationship was strained. We had some serious shouting matches. We’ve come a long, long way in our relationship and I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that we love each other. I hope my mom knows how much I love her. We love to tease her about all the silly things that she does…I hope she knows that I wouldn’t trade her for the world. I know I’ve never told her this. Despite all our disagreements, she has a heart of gold, is very forgiving, and has unwavering Faith. She may not always say the right thing and she may bring you stinky Chinese food and the movie “Deliverance” when you’re sick in bed, but she’s always there for you. I have so many “Ruby” stories…she’s infamous with my friends and co-workers. I am so thankful that we are so much closer now. We spend a lot of time laughing – and while it may be laughing AT each other, we’re together and we’re laughing…and I want to be laughing with my mom for 50 more years.