Love that Chicken at Popeye’s…
So I decided to eat lunch at my desk today, thinking that I had a Smart Ones meal in the fridge here at work. Turns out I only had a package of Brussels sprouts, which were yummy, but I was still hungry. So about 1:30 I set out to get a nice, healthy, Weight Watchers points-friendly sandwich from Thundercloud. But my car turned in the direction of Popeye’s instead…I’d been craving chicken strips and gravy for three days, so I decided to compromise and order the “naked” strips and green beans.
As I pulled up to the board to order, I could hear chatter from inside the restaurant coming out of the intercom. Funny, I thought…they don’t know I can hear them. I grinned. Somebody was having a good old time! Finally, the very chatty lady asked me for my order. I was feeling guilty for deciding to “cheat” and eat fast food, but hey, I thought…it’s NAKED chicken! How many calories could be in NAKED chicken for goodness sake? Trust me, it took all the will power in my body to not order the regular breaded and fried chicken strips with the red beans and rice or mashed potatoes.
When I drove up to the window to pay, I was greeted by the friendly intercom lady, who was wearing a gold, bejeweled handkerchief around her hair and sported thick, black eyeliner and gold eye shadow. She greeted me with, “Girl, that is a pretty and colorful blouse!”
I smiled and said, “Thank you.”
As she handed me my drink – iced tea, no sugar by the way – she tells me, “Cause I’m your size, ya know….that pretty shirt would fit me too. Um hum. Sure would.”
I just keep smiling, feeling a little uncomfortable now. So there goes my dream of sneaking to the Popeye’s incognito, I thought. If no one I know sees me get the fast food, I will feel better about it, I reasoned. My guilt about cheating was really sinking in.
“Do you ever go to the east side?” overly-friendly intercom lady asks.
“What? Oh, um…yeah…sometimes,” I lied, shaking my head profusely.
She looks me up and down as if she knows full well I NEVER go to the east side and I bend forward, looking into the kitchen wondering why it’s taking so long to cook NAKED chicken.
“Simply Fashions. That’s where you need to go. That’s where the big girls shop. Me and you. Uh huh…we’re the same size, girl. That’s where I shop. You ever been there?
I shake my head no, suddenly feeling very fat. How badly do I really want these chicken strips?
“Over by Fiesta? You know where that is? Well, you gotta go to Simply Fashions. I got me some $15-16 shirts there for like $5. Big girls like us go in there and they come out looking sharp, I tell ya.”
Oh God, please don’t ask me where I got my outfit or how much I paid for it. Suddenly I’m feeling very privileged – and ashamed of it. And still fat.
“And then of course there’s Rainbows,” she looks at me, seeing if I knew about the store. “You ain’t been to Rainbows? Girl, you gotta go there. You gotta come over to the east side sometime! They got all sorts of stuff for big girls like us. I mean they got regular stuff too, but it’s all big girls that go to Rainbows, like me and you. Uh huh.” She smiled, revealing a shiny gold grill on her teeth.
Suddenly I’m feeling…well, I’m not sure what I was feeling. But now I wanted those damn chicken strips even more. And the biscuit I was going to give away or throw away and not eat? Forget it, I’m eating it.
Finally, she hands me the box of NAKED chicken strips and green beans and tells me something like, “Now you gotta come back again, girl.”
“Thanks…I will," I muttered, thinking to myself that I’ll never visit Popeye’s again. Ever.
So now I know why they call it Weight Watchers…Ok, I get it. Not supposed to eat fast food. Or maybe I just need to watch out for over-friendly intercom lady.
2 comments:
Please write about the other Popeye's incident. I never want to forget that day.
Oh my! I will! I almost forgot about that!
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